The Barefoot Project | Leading mens mental health resource

The Fight Inside is our way of reaching out to the blokes who won’t reach out to us.

We know that for a lot of men, reaching out for help just isn’t on the cards. Whether it’s pride, distrust, or just not seeing yourself in what’s being offered — you keep it to yourself and try to work it out on your own.

The Fight Inside is here for that exact reason. It’s a free, online resource designed to meet men where they’re at — no sign-up, no pressure, and no bullshit. Just clear, practical tools based on what actually works: structure, understanding, and action.

This is where you can start the process on your own terms — building awareness, finding strategies that make sense, and working through the stuff that’s been dragging you down.

It’s not self-help. It’s a map.

Written by someone who’s been there, backed by evidence, and made for men who need a different kind of way forward.

The Fight Inside

(Naming What Most Blokes Are Battling in Silence)

There’s a fight most men are locked into — and it’s not the one you see on the outside.

It’s the one in your own head at 2am.
The one that has you walking around with a tight chest and no words.
The one that leaves you snapping at people you love, zoning out at work, or feeling like a ghost inside your own skin.

This fight doesn’t leave bruises you can show.
It doesn’t get trophies.
And most of the time, no one even knows you’re in it.

The fight inside isn’t weakness. It’s survival.
But survival mode isn’t where you’re meant to live.

The Cost of Staying Silent

Men are taught early to tough it out.
To work harder. To drink it away. To push through until you either collapse or blow up.

3 out of 4 suicides in Australia are men (ABS, 2023)
Men are less likely to seek help early — and more likely to face crisis points
Depression and anxiety often show up differently in men (anger, numbing out, overworking, risky behaviour)

The longer you stay in the fight without recognising it, the heavier it gets.

And the harder it becomes to even remember who you were before all this started.

You’re Not Broken — You’re Running Old Survival Wiring

Here’s the thing:
If you’re feeling anxious, flat, reactive, lost — it’s not because you’re defective.

It’s because your brain and body are wired for threat, not for modern life.

Your amygdala (threat detector) is scanning for danger 24/7.
Your nervous system kicks you into fight, flight, or freeze without asking permission.
Your thinking brain (prefrontal cortex) often comes online after the damage is done.

This isn’t a flaw. It’s biology.

But it means if you don’t learn how to work with it — it runs your life.

What the Fight Looks Like (Even If You’re Not Naming It Yet)

You might be deep in it if:

You feel exhausted even after a full night's sleep
You avoid people you used to enjoy being around
You explode at small frustrations — then feel ashamed
You numb out with work, food, porn, booze, or scrolling
You feel disconnected from your own body or emotions
You’ve lost drive, passion, or joy — and you don’t know how to get it back

You’re not imagining it.

You’re not “just being soft.”

You’re stuck in survival gear.

The First Move: Name the Fight

You don’t fix what you won’t face.
You can’t out-run it.
You can’t out-drink it.
You can’t out-work it.

You can only start by naming the fight inside.

Once you name it, you can understand it.
Once you understand it, you can learn to work with it.
And once you can work with it — the whole game changes.

Take It Into Your Life

Self Check-In:

I feel emotionally numb, angry, or disconnected most days
I’m relying on distractions more than I want to admit
I haven’t felt fully like myself in months (or years)
I often tell people “I’m fine” when I’m absolutely not
I’ve felt like giving up, even if I haven’t said it out loud

Write shit down:

When was the last time I felt fully alive — even for a moment? What’s changed since then?

Mini Challenge:

This week, say one honest sentence about how you’re doing to someone you trust.
No speeches. No therapy session. Just a crack in the armour.

Examples:

“I’ve been struggling more than I let on.”
“It’s been a rough few months, hey.”
“Trying to sort my head out a bit lately.”

Real talk is how the fight inside loses power.

Why Men Don’t Talk

(The Rules We Never Chose — And Why They’re Failing Us)

Most blokes didn’t wake up one day and decide,

“I’ll keep everything bottled up for the rest of my life.”

It happens way earlier than that.

It’s wired into us from the first scraped knee, the first lost footy match, the first time someone told us to harden up instead of feeling it.

We grow up with a rulebook we didn’t ask for — but most of us live by it anyway.

The Unwritten Rules Men Learn Early

Don’t cry
Don’t complain
Don’t show weakness
Don’t need anyone
Get on with it

Every time you hear those messages, it trains your brain:

Feeling = dangerous
Needing help = shameful
Silence = survival

Neurobiologically, this matters.

When boys are shamed or punished for showing emotion, their amygdala activation (threat response) spikes.

Over time, the brain disconnects emotional experience from language and expression (Panksepp, 2004).

You learn it’s safer not to feel — or at least not to show it.

The Cost of Silence

You don’t stop feeling just because you stop talking. You just bury it deeper.

Buried long enough, it mutates:

Anxiety that looks like rage
Depression that looks like drinking
Fear that looks like bravado
Grief that looks like apathy

And over time, that internal pressure builds until something cracks — your health, your relationships, your job, your body.

It’s not weakness that breaks men. It’s disconnection — from yourself and from others.

Why Men Stay Quiet Even When They’re Drowning

Even when the pressure gets unbearable, a lot of men still don’t reach out.

Here’s why:

Fear of judgment: “They’ll think I’m weak.”
Fear of being a burden: “They’ve got enough going on.”
Not having the words: “I don’t even know how to explain it.”
Thinking it’s pointless: “Talking won’t change anything.”
Self-sufficiency wiring: “I should be able to sort this myself.”

Every one of these makes emotional isolation feel safer than honesty — even though it’s killing you slowly.

The Body Remembers What the Mind Tries to Forget

You can think you’re “over it.”
You can bury it for years.
You can distract yourself with work, money, achievements.

But your body keeps the score.

Chronic stress, suppressed emotion, and isolation fuel:

Heart disease
Gut problems
Sleep disorders
Addictions
Autoimmune conditions

(Reference: van der Kolk, 2015 - The Body Keeps the Score)

You’re not imagining it. You’re carrying it — even if you can’t name it yet.

Real Talk: What Opening Up Actually Looks Like

Opening up doesn’t mean crying into a beer or baring your soul to strangers.

It might mean:

Saying, “Yeah, I’ve been struggling a bit lately.”
Telling a mate, “Not been myself — let’s catch up.”
Admitting to yourself, “I’m not okay — and that’s okay.”

It’s not about dumping everything.
It’s about breaking the silence — even by 1%.
That tiny crack lets light in.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Am I more comfortable distracting myself than talking about what’s going on?
Have I lost touch with how I actually feel most days?
Do I believe asking for help would make me weak?
Have I pushed people away without meaning to?
Have I kept something bottled up that’s getting heavier to carry?

Write Shit Down:

What’s one emotion I’ve been hiding — and what would it feel like to say it out loud, even to myself?

Action Step:

This week, send a simple check-in message to a mate.
No deep chats required — just connection.

Example:

“Been thinking we should catch up — been a bit off lately. Let’s grab a beer?”

You don't have to unload everything.
You just have to stop disappearing.

Understanding the Nervous System

(You’re Not Weak — You’re Wired That Way)

If you’ve ever blown up over nothing, shut down when you needed to speak up, or felt stuck in a loop of anxiety, anger, or numbness —
it’s not because you’re broken.

It’s because your nervous system is doing exactly what it was built to do: protect you.

Survival mode isn’t a flaw. It’s a system.
The trick is learning how to recognise it — and work with it, not against it.

Your Nervous System: The Hidden Engine Running the Show

Inside you right now is a system scanning every second for one thing:
Am I safe? Or am I under threat?

That system is called the autonomic nervous system — and it controls way more than you think:

Your heartbeat
Your breathing
Your muscle tension
Your digestion
Your energy levels
Your emotions

It’s not logical.

It’s fast, automatic, and ancient.

You don’t choose how you react at first.

But you can learn to notice it — and shift it.

The Three States You Move Between (Polyvagal Theory Made Simple)

Thanks to research like Dr. Stephen Porges' Polyvagal Theory, we now know you don’t just have a stress response.

You have three different gears your body switches through:

Green Zone — Calm and Connected (Ventral Vagal State)

When you’re here, you feel:

Calm but alert
Open to talking and connecting
Able to think clearly and problem-solve
More playful, relaxed, and human

This is your safe zone.
Your body runs properly here — digestion, immune system, sleep, energy.

Red Zone — Fight or Flight (Sympathetic State)

When you’re here, you feel:

Tense, restless, wired, or angry
Ready to argue, escape, or explode
Jumpy, impatient, edgy

This is survival mode — great if you’re facing a real threat.
Terrible if it’s just a rough conversation or a bad day at work.

Blue Zone — Shutdown (Dorsal Vagal State)

When you’re here, you feel:

Numb, flat, disconnected
Frozen, spaced out, hopeless
Like you just want to disappear

This is your body hitting the emergency brakes.
It happens when stress feels overwhelming or never-ending.

Why You React Before You Think

When something triggers you:

Your amygdala (threat alarm) fires first
Your nervous system throws you into action or shutdown
Your thinking brain (prefrontal cortex) shows up late

You’re reacting because your body thinks it’s life or death — even when it’s not.

That’s not weakness.

That’s wiring.

Science Behind the Storm

Adrenaline dumps into your bloodstream (instant readiness)
Cortisol rises (sustains alertness, damages long-term if stuck)
Heart rate and breathing speed up
Blood flow shifts away from digestion toward muscles
Logical thinking drops off (you react instead of reflect)

(Reference: Sapolsky, 2004 — Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers)

Your body isn’t asking what’s smart.

It’s asking what will keep me alive in the next 10 seconds.

Signs You’re Stuck in a Gear

Red Zone:

Tight chest
Racing thoughts
Snappy or restless
Can’t sit still
Overthinking worst-case scenarios

Blue Zone:

Heavy limbs
Numbness or zoning out
Sleeping too much or not at all
Feeling empty or invisible
Ghosting people without knowing why

Green Zone:

Calm breathing
Steady, clear thoughts
Able to laugh, think, and connect
Feeling present, not spaced out

How to Shift Gears (Regulation Tools that Work)

You can’t think your way out of survival mode.

You need to use your body to send the “I’m safe” signal back to your brain.

Reset Techniques:

Breathwork: Long exhales (inhale 4 seconds, exhale 6+ seconds)
Cold Exposure: Cold showers, splash face with cold water
Movement: Walk, lift, stretch, shake tension out
Grounding: Focus on your senses (5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, etc.)
Connection: Spend time with someone you trust — even quietly

Every time you do this, you train your nervous system that it can move out of survival and back into stability faster.

This is called building vagal tone — and it’s the key to long-term resilience.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Am I living most days stuck in fight, flight, or freeze?
Do I overreact to small things and feel like it’s out of my hands?
Do I often feel numb, disconnected, or invisible?
Do I struggle to come back to calm after stress?
Do I notice my body trying to warn me — but ignore it?

Write Shit Down:

What physical signs (tight chest, numbness, tension) show up when I’m stressed — and what helps bring me back?

Action Step:

Pick one reset tool (breathwork, cold water, movement, grounding, or connection) — and practice it once today when you feel off.

You don’t have to fix everything today.
You just have to start working with your system, not fighting it.

Mindfulness Without the Fluff

(Awareness as a Survival Skill, Not a Buzzword)

Most blokes hear the word “mindfulness” and tune out.
It sounds like yoga mats, crystals, and sitting still for hours.

But here’s the real deal:

Mindfulness isn’t about being calm. It’s about noticing what’s happening before it wrecks you.

It’s not soft. It’s a survival skill.

It’s the thing that gives you a second’s breathing space between a trigger and a reaction — and that second can change everything.

Why Mindfulness Really Means

At its core, mindfulness is simple:

Pay attention, on purpose, without judgment.

That’s it.

It’s not about clearing your mind. It’s not about being peaceful all the time. It’s about building awareness so you’re not constantly being hijacked by automatic reactions.

When you’re mindful, you can:

Spot when you’re about to snap
Notice when you’re spiralling
Catch yourself numbing out before you sink deeper
Choose your next move — instead of regretting it later

The Science Behind It

Studies show mindfulness:

Strengthens the prefrontal cortex (the thinking brain)
Lowers activity in the amygdala (the threat alarm system)
Reduces cortisol levels (stress hormone)
Improves emotional regulation and impulse control

(Reference: Davidson & Goleman, 2017 — Altered Traits)

Mindfulness literally rewires your brain for better control under pressure.

Why Mindfulness Works for Men (When Done Right)

You don’t have to sit still for an hour. You don’t have to chant.

You can practice mindfulness:

While training
While surfing
While fishing
While hiking
Even while doing the dishes

It’s about being where you are — not lost in your head, not lost in your phone, not lost in panic.

Signs You’re Running on Autopilot:

You react to things without knowing why
You zone out while driving, training, eating
You feel disconnected from your body
You miss warning signs until it's too late
Your days blur together and feel flat

Mindfulness snaps you out of autopilot and back into the driver's seat.

Simple Ways to Start Practicing

You don’t need a new hobby. You need new awareness.

Basic Drills:

Mindful walking: Notice your feet hitting the ground. Feel the air. Hear the sounds around you.
Mindful breathing: Inhale deeply, exhale slowly. Focus on nothing but your breath for 1 minute.
Mindful eating: Eat one meal today without screens. Pay attention to the taste, texture, and smell.
Mindful lifting/training: Focus fully on each rep — the feel of the movement, not the outcome.

It’s about using what you’re already doing — but doing it with awareness.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Am I running on autopilot most days?
Do I miss when my mood or body shifts until it’s too late?
Do I react more than I respond?
Do I feel disconnected from what I’m doing — even when it’s stuff I enjoy?
Could slowing down my attention by 5% help me make better choices?

Write Shit Down:

What’s one moment today where I completely missed being present — and what would it have looked like to slow down instead?

Action Step:

Pick one basic drill (walking, breathing, eating, training) — and do it mindfully once today.
Not perfectly. Just on purpose.

One moment of awareness can start changing everything.

Emotional Regulation for Real Life

(How to Feel Without Getting Flogged by It)

Most of us never got taught how to handle emotions.

We got taught how to:

Bottle them up
Blow them up
Numb them out
Pretend they don't exist

But here’s the truth:

Emotions aren’t the problem.

Not knowing what to do with them is the problem.

Emotional regulation isn’t about being soft.
It’s about staying dangerous but controlled.

It’s about being able to feel without being floored.

What Emotional Regulation Actually Is

It’s not ignoring how you feel.
It’s not being hyper-emotional either.

It’s recognising what’s happening inside you — and choosing how to respond.

Real regulation looks like:

Knowing when you’re building up before you blow
Naming the feeling instead of pretending it’s not there
Moving the emotion through your body instead of letting it wreck your day
Making decisions based on your values, not your mood

The Science of Why It Matters

When you regulate emotions well:

You stay in your prefrontal cortex (logical brain) longer
You avoid getting trapped in amygdala hijacks (survival brain)
You lower cortisol spikes and recover faster from stress
You strengthen resilience in the nervous system

(Reference: Siegel, 2010 — The Developing Mind)

It’s literally a biological upgrade — not just a mindset.

Why Men Struggle With Emotional Regulation

Blokes are often only allowed two emotions:

Anger
Numbness

Everything else — fear, sadness, grief, shame — gets buried or turned into rage.

The problem is:

Anger burns people out.
Numbness isolates you.

Real strength is being able to feel without either losing control or switching off completely.

Signs You’re Not Regulating (Yet)

You go from calm to furious in 10 seconds flat
You ghost people for days when stressed
You snap at the wrong people
You self-sabotage when emotions get too big
You feel emotionally numb for days or weeks at a time

If this sounds like you — welcome to the club.
The good news? You can train emotional regulation like a muscle.

The 4-Step Framework to Regulate in Real Life

1. Name It

If you can’t name it, you can’t manage it.
Go deeper than “stressed.” Try:

Angry
Anxious
Rejected
Afraid
Lonely

Even putting a rough name on it calms the nervous system slightly.

2. Feel It (Without Feeding It)

Feelings rise and fall like waves.
If you don't fuel them with catastrophic thoughts, they usually peak and fade in 60–90 seconds.

Breathe into it
Notice where it lives in your body
Let it pass like weather — not define your day

3. Move It

Stuck emotions need movement to clear.

If you’re angry — move hard (punch a bag, train, run)
If you’re anxious — walk, stretch, shake
If you’re flat — cold water, loud music, heavy lifting

Your body needs to release the chemical load built up by the emotion.

4. Choose Your Next Move

Once you’re calmer, ask:

What’s one decision I can make right now that’s aligned with the man I want to be — not the mood I’m in?

Respond, don’t react.

That’s where real emotional power comes from.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Do I bottle up feelings until they explode?
Do I numb out instead of dealing with emotions?
Do I avoid naming what’s actually going on inside me?
Do emotions drive my behaviour more than I’d like to admit?
Do I recover slowly after emotional storms?

Write Shit Down:

What’s one emotion I usually avoid — and what tends to happen when I do?

Action Step:

Next time you feel a strong emotion, try the 4-step framework:
Name it.
Feel it.
Move it.
Choose your next move.

Don’t try to master it.
Just practice it once.

Real strength is built repetition by repetition — not by perfection.

Rebuilding Through Routine

(Anchoring Yourself When the World Feels Like It’s Falling Apart)

When life goes sideways — whether it’s burnout, grief, depression, or just life kicking you in the guts —
the last thing you’ll feel like doing is sticking to a routine.

But that’s exactly when you need one most.

Routine isn’t about being productive.
It’s about survival. Stability. Self-respect.

It’s about giving yourself a structure to hold onto when your mind and body are trying to sink.

Why Routine Isn’t Just for “Organised People”

When your nervous system is fried, your sense of time, motivation, and memory all take a hit.

You forget the basics: eating, sleeping, moving, connecting.

Routine gives your brain small, steady signals that you’re safe and functioning.

It’s like putting scaffolding around a crumbling building — it doesn’t fix everything instantly, but it stops the collapse.

The Science Behind It

Predictability reduces cortisol levels (stress hormone)
Small wins boost dopamine (motivation chemical)
Repetition stabilises the nervous system
Anchors like wake-up times regulate your circadian rhythm, which is critical for mood, energy, and recovery

(Reference: McEwen, 2007 — The Neurobiology of Stress)

Tiny routines rebuild big stability.

What Happens Without Routine

Days blur together
Sleep patterns collapse
Nutrition falls apart
Physical health tanks
You isolate and withdraw
Decision-making becomes reactive and emotional

It’s not about willpower.
It’s about not giving your brain any more chaos to deal with than it already has.

The Five Core Pillars of a Functional Routine

You don’t need 100 new habits.

You need 5 non-negotiables:

1. Wake Around the Same Time

Not 5am boot camp style.
Just consistent — even on weekends. It regulates your body clock.

2. Move Your Body

You don’t have to train like an athlete.
Walk, stretch, lift something heavy. Move blood, move breath, move mood.

3. Eat Something Real

Get real food into your body.
Skip surviving on caffeine and sugar crashes.

4. Connect to Someone

You don’t need a deep-and-meaningful every day.
A text, a chat at work, a nod at the gym — stay tethered to humanity.

5. Anchor Your Evenings

Have a shutdown ritual:
Low lights, no screens in bed, simple wind-down breathwork or reflection.

Signs You’re Falling Apart (and Need Routine Badly)

Sleeping all day or struggling to sleep at all
Eating junk or forgetting meals altogether
Isolating and ghosting people
Losing time in social media or TV
Feeling increasingly overwhelmed by basic tasks

If this sounds familiar — routine isn’t a luxury, it’s life support.

The “Minimum Dose” Routine for Hard Days

When you’re low, aim for the bare essentials:

Get up and make the bed
Drink a full glass of water
Eat a real meal
Move your body for 10 minutes
Step outside for sunlight
Text or call one human being

That’s your line in the sand.
That’s keeping your system from freefall.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Am I living reactively without structure?
Is my sleep, food, or movement falling apart?
Have I lost basic habits that used to help me stay steady?
Do my days feel overwhelming, chaotic, or pointless?
Would rebuilding small daily anchors change my momentum?

Write Shit Down:

What are 3 basic things I can commit to doing every day this week — even if I feel like shit?

Action Step:

Set a simple morning and evening anchor for the next 7 days:
One thing you’ll do after waking.
One thing you’ll do before bed.

Not perfectly.
Not to impress anyone.
Just to show yourself you’re still in the fight.

Brotherhood and Why Going It Alone Doesn’t Work

(Real Strength Doesn’t Happen Alone)

Somewhere along the line, men were sold the idea that real strength means doing everything alone.

Suffer alone.

Sort it out alone.

Survive alone.

But here’s the truth:

Isolation doesn’t make you stronger. It makes you more vulnerable — to depression, addiction, burnout, and breakdown.

You can be tough as nails and still crumble without a solid crew around you.

Why We Learned to Go It Alone

From an early age, men get the message:

Don’t ask for help
Don’t lean on anyone
Don’t need anything
Don’t show weakness

It’s built into sports culture, work culture, even family dynamics.

But biologically, humans — especially men — are wired for tribe.
Isolation wasn’t how we survived. Brotherhood was.

When you cut yourself off, you’re fighting millions of years of evolution — and you’re doing it the hardest way possible.

The Science of Connection

Research shows:

Connection lowers cortisol (stress)
Social support boosts oxytocin (calm and trust hormone)
Loneliness increases the risk of early death by 26% (Holt-Lunstad, 2015)

In short:
Isolation physically damages you.
Connection literally heals you.

You don’t have to bare your soul to a hundred people.
You just need a few solid blokes who’ve got your back.

Signs You’re Too Isolated

You go days without a real conversation
You tell everyone you’re fine, no matter what
You feel like no one really knows you anymore
You handle every struggle solo, even when you’re drowning
You’re uncomfortable asking for help — even small things

Isolation isn’t just being physically alone.
It’s living like no one would understand even if they tried.

What Brotherhood Really Means (No Group Hugs Required)

Real brotherhood isn’t about deep emotional therapy sessions.
It’s about:

Showing up consistently
Having mates who check in without needing a reason
Talking straight when it matters
Doing things shoulder-to-shoulder — training, hiking, working, adventuring
Having someone who notices when you go quiet — and says something

It’s the quiet agreements that say, "I've got you."

Not because you’re broken.

Because you’re human.

How to Rebuild Brotherhood (Even if You Feel Rusty)

Text a mate you haven’t seen for months. Keep it simple.
Say yes to the next invite — even if you don't feel like it.
Start something low-pressure — weekend walks, a monthly catch-up, whatever.
Offer help when someone needs it — small favours build strong bonds.
Be the one who checks in first — don’t wait for someone else.

It doesn’t have to be perfect.

It just has to be real.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Have I isolated myself more than I realised?
Have I convinced myself no one would understand?
Do I only open up under extreme pressure — if at all?
Am I willing to reconnect, even if it feels awkward at first?
Could small consistent connections make a real difference for me?

Write Shit Down:

Who are 2–3 people I trust, even a little — and what’s one small way I could reconnect this week?

Action Step:

Reach out to one bloke this week.
Simple text. Call. Coffee. Surf. Gym.
Doesn’t have to be deep — just show up.

Strength isn’t built alone.
It never was.

Building Your Mental Health Plan

(Don’t Wait for the Crash — Build Before You Break)

If you wait until you’re falling apart to think about mental health, you’re already playing catch-up.

Real strength is building a plan while you’re still standing.

A simple, no-fluff blueprint that holds you steady when life gets heavy — because sooner or later, it will.

Mental health isn’t a rescue mission. It’s maintenance.

You don’t need a complicated system.
You need something real, usable, and ready before the wheels come off.

Why Having a Plan Changes Everything

When you hit a rough patch:

You can’t think clearly
You default to survival mode
You lose track of what actually helps

A good mental health plan:

Catches you early
Gives you a map to follow when your head’s a mess
Anchors you to what works instead of what feels easiest in the moment

It’s not weakness to plan ahead.

It’s discipline.

The Bio-Psycho-Social Model (No Therapist Talk Required)

Good mental health covers three areas:

Body (Bio)

Mind (Psycho)

People & Environment (Social)

Sleep, food, movement, energy

Thoughts, coping habits, emotional skills

Mates, community, work, surroundings

When one area suffers, the others wobble too.
When you keep all three in check, you stay steady.

The Core Parts of Your Plan

1. Know Your Baseline

What does “doing well” actually look like for you?

How much sleep?
How much movement?
How often do you see mates?
How do you know you’re thriving?

Write it down.
This is what you’re aiming to protect.

2. Know Your Warning Signs

What shows up first when you’re sliding?

Stop training?
Avoid calls?
Sleeping too much or not enough?
Rage at small things?
Binge drinking, scrolling, ghosting people?

These are your early red flags.

3. Build Your Reset Toolkit

When things start slipping, what gets you back on track?

Body:

Move — walk, stretch, lift
Eat something real
Get outside for sunlight

Mind:

Breathwork
Journaling
Mindful resets

Social:

Message a mate
Book a catch-up
Ask for backup if you need it

Don’t overcomplicate it.
Simple, fast, real.

4. Know Your Crew

Who’s in your corner when it counts?

One or two mates you trust
A mentor, coach, or therapist if needed
Crisis contacts if things ever hit rock bottom

You’re not meant to do this alone — and you won’t always have the clarity to reach out unless you set it up in advance.

5. Write Your Don’t List

When you’re struggling, some behaviours make it worse fast.

Your “Don’t List” could be:

Don’t isolate for more than 24 hours
Don’t skip training three days in a row
Don’t make major life decisions when you’re exhausted
Don’t use booze or screens to self-medicate

Write it. Own it. Stick to it when you’re slipping.

Take It Into Your Life

Ask Yourself:

Do I actually know what “doing well” looks like for me?
Do I notice when my mental health starts sliding — or only when I crash?
Do I have a reset plan — or just hope it sorts itself out?
Do I have at least one or two people I can call if I need to?
Am I willing to take mental health seriously — even when I’m “fine”?

Write Shit Down:

What’s one part of my mental health (body, mind, or social) that I’m neglecting right now — and what’s one step I could take to strengthen it?

Action Step:

Today, write a rough version of your mental health plan.

Keep it simple.

Stick it somewhere you’ll see it.

When life gets heavy, you’ll be glad you built it before the storm hit.